Well what a fine morning it has been so far. The Buik took one look at me when I got up and told me I looked 'drunk'. Just to clarify this - I am feeling rather delicate at the moment. No, not from having one of those endless parties at home ;) but I seem to have contracted a cold from someone and in between sneezing, wheezing, coughing like a 20 a day smoker and threatening to keel over, I am trying to soldier on as normal. However this morning I should have stayed home. Going to work looking like a 'drunk' is not really my corporate uniform of choice.

My girlfriend, let's call her P, because that is what I call her :) decided to host a birthday party at home for herself to celebrate being 18 again (age non disclosed). Now I always look forward to being hosted at someones house. The warmth you feel when you are welcomed into the bosom of any home is delightful and I knew we would have lots of fun. You may be wondering why I am even blogging about my girlfriends party. Well a) she asked me to ;) and b) sorry there is no b. Today I am just following P's orders :)

I arrived at 7.30pm with 2 friends that had just arrived from work. Apologies to the apartment directly below P's. No, that wasnt 3 elephants clattering up your stairs last night, it was in fact, 3 delectable ladies with high heels on negotiating 5 sets of death trap stairs :) We were knackered from that bout of exercise and was rewarded with a glass of champagne for our ascent.

P had done her apartment proud. It looked beautiful. Table laid with pretty cloth and nibbles to put us on until the feast was served. She had obviously been reading my 'How to be a housewife book'. The other girls arrived and the cackling began. Like witches around a cauldron.

We spent far too much time discussing the relative merits of the Sonja Bakker diet compared to the South Beach diet and an inordinate amount of time discussing nose sprays (dont ask). I am sure if our respective OH's had seen us, they would have been suitably horrified and bored rigid. It is only girls, or at least the girls I am close to over here, that can spend a whole evening discussing whether Andy Garcia really IS 5ft nothing and the state of Brad Pitt's skin. The Middle East conflict and the war in Afgahnistan went unresolved last night, but we all had enormous amounts of fun.

Food up next. P did a fabulous spread :) Quiche to start with (none of this supermarket shite, hand made by her own fair hands). It was fabulous. Dressed with a simple salad, it was the perfect light starter. In true Amsterdam style, the last person to finish eating signalled a 2 cigarette break and more cackling began over Cameron Diaz's skirt that M saw on People.com the other day. All high brow conversations here you know :)

For main course we ate a chicken curry which I loved. Creamy and spicy, just the way it should be, all mopped up with Turkish bread from heaven. And for the token vegetarian, P made a 'Yemini curry dish' which had the devils work that is Tofu in, a beautiful tomatoey, spicy sauce. Tofu should be eaten this way and this way only.

Another 2 cigarettes later, we had the ultimate of desserts. Chocolate fondue with fruit and marshmellows. Now you know my utter hatred for anything fruit like. Well I can report that fruit is the perfect vehicle for melted chocolate. You simply cant beat it. And by the time we'd finished that little lot, most of us were comparing our 4 month pregnant bellies.

It was a civilised dinner as everyone shuffled out well before midnight - well done to us all. Our OH's could learn a lesson or two from us (Blondie readjusts her beautifully polished halo)

Thank you P Meister for holding a fabulous dinner party.

Till next year x

“The Buik”. For those of you not familiar with this term, its direct translation from Dutch is “The Belly”. Why I am called “The Buik” I really can’t imagine, it is purely a matter of perception. In any case the title of “Blondieandthebuik” was dreamt up by Blondie following the pork chop marathon week. I was in no fit state to argue.

Living in the Dam with my beautiful wife “Blondie”, and that shall be the last time you shall hear me say anything so sickly sweet, I am bored of food. When I say this I really mean it. I couldn’t give a rats’ arse about it. No seriously, I am thoroughly pissed of with it. I can honestly say I haven’t eaten anything in at least the last 5 years which has made me tremble with delight. Let me re-phrase that. I haven’t eaten any food in at least the last 5 years which has made me tremble with delight. Overindulgence in the past? Maybe. Spoilt? Maybe. Why write a food blog with Blondie you may ask. Keep your big fat arse out of it! I hear you cry. NO. I want my say. We are married and I need my say. It just wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t have my say. So there you are. I shall be putting in my pennies worth. I hope you enjoy it.

Zero – 16. Brought up by an Italian father and English mother. Plenty of trips to Italy as a child, experiencing all that it brings into your Foodie heaven. To me it was “normal”. At least I thought it was until my father served up my pet rabbit.

16 – 22. I worked in restaurants. Waiter, Chef and Flambé, yes this was the super 80’s !!!! Tight trousers, waist coat, bow tie and demi-waived hair. I was the kipper’s knickers. So I thought. I forgot I was working in Yorkshire. 

22 – Now. No, I shan’t be giving my age away. You can work it out yourself. At the age of 22 I found IT. No more split shifts and more importantly, no more pandering to some tosser’s desire to show off in front of the girl he was hoping to lay later that night. IT consultancy brought with it travel. Not just business travel but I have also managed to get around to a few places off my own back. With travel comes food. Business travel, lots of it. Really lots. Now this is where I start to get spoilt. I have had the pleasure of staying and eating in some of the Worlds most prestigious places. I have never really saved my cash. I rather like spending the stuff. If there has ever been a chance to experience “the best” I have gone for it. Not just hotels and restaurants but also life itself. I am a Taurus, I am decadent, can be rude and most certainly straight to the point. This is going to upset Blondie. I see what she has written. She has been very careful with her language. You really should hear it over our dinner table, when I pull my face up at her latest creation of some butter soaked pigeon under wing with turtle flipper juus and truffle scented pig snout. I shall swear. I hope it doesn’t offend. 

The Buik.

So here you are. I'd like to think you've happened up on my fabulously humorous blog by accident, but more likely, you've been pestered to read it by yours truly. Either way, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I am doing writing it.

I decided to write this blog for a number of reasons. A) I was sick of reading 'fabulous' reviews by IENS, and Specialbite (well known restaurant websites in the Netherlands) and believing that everything in the culinary blackhole that is Amsterdam, was fabulous, when it certainly wasnt. B) I needed to channel my creative juices into something other than nail painting, eyebrow plucking or bath towel folding. C) And most importantly, I wanted a chance to exercise the right to be as sarcastic as I want with no censorship:) Being sarcastic is not something that my current job affords me, as I have to be polite, cheerful (if I can be arsed) and professional. It keeps me in handbags, holidays and houses and I think its probably not a good idea to offend the person that signs off my invoices every month :) So I saved up all my sarcasm and let loose on here daily.

Also, coming from the beautiful island that is the UK, I have been inherently blessed with a cracking sense of humour, honed even more by being a Northerner :) and so I thought I'd write a blog that was a little different to the food blogs you see normally.

So, I'm Blondie (not my real name I hasten to add) and am married to the 'The Buik'. I live in Amsterdam and am an I.T Consultant by day and Chef Extraordinaire/general glutton by night. I love food, eating out and anything to do with food. And food. Did I mention food? Just in case you didnt get that, I like food. And wine. And champagne. And cocktails. And eating out. There I think I've covered all the bases. I have to warn you now - if you are expecting perfectly proportioned, prepared and presented food on here, with pictures of me looking all radiant in 4inch heels with a pinny on (actually, hold that thought right there my girlfriend said ;) you've come to the wrong place. I wont be imparting any recipes of the fabulous food we eat at home. That isnt the purpose of the website. Believe it or not, I am not particularly narcissitc and dont think my food would stand up to the scrutiny of the internet foodies :)

So I hope I havent bored you senseless with this introduction - please bear with me - I'm still modifying the layout and hope to increase the content substantially, for Amsterdam at least.

Enjoy - Blondie xxx